FINALLY: We Found Evidence That Colin Kaepernick Was Oppressed

…just kidding, Colin Kaepernick has enjoyed a quality standard of living his entire life.

Despite not working for over a year at this point, former San Francisco 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick has managed to stay relevant not just in sports media, but news media as a whole. His 2016 protest against “racial injustice,” which apparently did not extend to Fidel Castro’s communist Cuba, is looking like it will make him more money than his NFL career did.

Let’s be very honest about who the real winners and losers are right now in the Colin Kaepernick saga. After signing a lucrative contract with Nike, it might appear the disgraced athlete himself might win the day. But, that isn’t the case. Nike has demonstrated that even people who pretend to hate capitalism secretly love it. Sales for the company’s shoes are up, and a lot of that is due to some clever political marketing ahead of Labor Day weekend.

Nike isn’t going anywhere, no matter how many Trump supporters set the the products they’ve already purchased on fire. Kaepernick, however, will. His facade will fade eventually, and so will his insane claim that America is actually a deeply racist place. Considering his personal past, it’s really hard to imagine how he came to that conclusion.

It’s almost as if he needed something to remain relevant after losing his position as a starting quarterback or something…

~ Facts not Memes


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